Halloween Again…

Well folks, the time is upon us again where we worship idealizations of the weakest motherfuckers in the history of film and cinema…

MOVIE MONSTERS!

Just weak, weak, pathetic motherfuckers for no goddamn reason at all…

Freddy Krueger: “Oh… Poor me! I was a child molester and murderer who got killed by angry parents! But now I get even now by terrorizing and murdering kids in their sleep, so that I can feel tough!

I’m an immortal, but I pick on mortal beings because it gives me a sense of power! I’m working the shit out of this overwhelmingly unfair advantage I have!

I matter!”

Jason Voorhees: “Oh… Poor me! Mama died and now I have to kill people! I could use my immortaility too do anything I choose, but I choose to terrorize and kill people — taking full advantage of my indestructability!

I’m so tough!”

Pinhead (Hellraiser): “Yeah, I come from hell… I’ve been caged up with the some of baddest demons in the universe! You know my REAL passion though…? Not going up against equals, but bullying soft spongey humans. Ahhh… Nothing quite hits the spot like terrorizing beings I KNOW can’t fight me back on fair terms!

I’m superior!”

LOL, could imagine if these guys started some stupid movement, like “Make Imagination Terrorizing Again”?

Could imagine the droves of cowardly ideologues they’d attract to such a weak platform?

Cowardly ideologue: “We need terror! We need to terrorize people in order to keep ourselves safe! Freddy’s my hero because tells it like it is!”

Hahahahaha…

And yet every year, here we are right on time, paying homage to the most literal representations of cowardice.

Way to go, humans. Way to make us great, guys…