The Game Show

“Hello out there! And welcome to the exciting game of SHOULD YOU EVEN EXIST AT ALL?! I’m your host, Reality. Today’s guests are…”

Ideologues: “Wohoo! Yeah! We’re here to win! Let’s kick ass and take names!”

Reality: “SHUT THE HELL UP!!”

Ideologues: “Bruh jealous ’cause we the best!”

Reality (sighs and face palms): “Today’s guests are Conscientious People vs Ideologues.”

Ideologues: “Go team! We running this shit!”

Reality: “I swear on everything I’m about to punch y’all right in yo muthafu… I’m sorry. I digress. The way the game is played is simple. I’m going to ask you a series of questions and give each of you opportunities to answer. Buzzing in will determine the order in which you speak. At the end of the show we’ll tally your points to determine whether or not you should even exist at all. Are the contestants ready?”

Ideologues: “We were BORN ready!!”

Conscientious People: “Yes.”

Reality: “Question 1… Should you A) try to understand and solve problems, or B) use problems as excuses to blame and punish others, towards taking your anger and frustrations out on other people and things?”

Ideologues: “B!! Problems are always somebody else’s fault, so motherfuckers need to pay! If somebody fucks up or makes any kind of mistake, we wanna see them injured and humiliated for our own amusement and satisfaction!”

Reality: “You didn’t even buzz in, you ignorant cows…”

Ideologues: “Whatever! You just jealous cause we killing it!”

Reality: “Conscientious People, what’s your answer?”

Conscientious People: “Obviously, A) try to understand and solve problems. We think we see where you’re going with this. Do you even need us for this bit?”

Reality: “Um… stand by. I’ll call on you when or if I feel it’s useful.”

Conscientious People: “Got you.”

Reality: “Onto the next question. Question 2… What’s better? Competition or cooperation?”

Ideologues: “Competition!! We have to flex on motherfuckers and prove we’re superior to everyone! We both want and deserve all of the praise, satisfaction, degrees of freedom, comforts and rewards! Fuck yeah!!”

Reality: “(sigh…) I can see this is going to take forever. Let’s just skip to the Lightening Round. Ideologues, are you ready?”

Ideologues: “Of course we are! We rule! We’re the fucking best!”

Reality: “You stupid muthafu… (breathes) When encountering someone or something new, what should be your priority? A) To explore and learn things properly, or B) trying to ‘defeat’ who or what you encounter with what you think you know?”

Ideologues: “B!! We gotta show motherfuckers who’s boss and who’s right! WE’RE RIGHT!!!”

Reality: “Would you rather A) fight, or B) effectively communicate towards solving problems?”

Ideologues: “Knuck if you buck! A! We bout that life! A!! We fighting!”

Reality: “What’s more important to you? A) always standing beside and defending your groups and labels? Or B) being self-guided, and brave enough to both accept and pursue truth on your own?”

Ideologues: “A, groups and labels for the win! They define us, and help us define ourselves against those we want to defeat and lord it over!!”

Reality: “To think systemically, one must A) de-prioritize self in order to see how things fit, flow and function together around them so that they can move in rhythm and in harmony with the environments they cohabitate, or B) make everything about them, and their experience and comfort, and then work nonstop to make everything around them recognize, edify and conform to them and their experience?”

Ideologues: “There were way too many big words in that, and we’re not sure we know what you’re talking about, but B sounds right! So we’re gonna go with B!!”

Reality: “Figured as much…”

Ideologues: “Dawg, we killing it!!”

Reality: “Who should you listen to… A) Me (reality), via your faculties of intuition and empathetic connection to living systems and building blocks, or B) each other and/or other humans?”

Ideologues: “B!! Our consensus and knowledge systems are what create you! We should ALWAYS listen to other humans first, because humans are the ones creating reality!”

Reality: “Should you A) feel an empathetic connection to all humans, or B) only look out for and take care of you and yours?”

Ideologues: “B!! Only we matter! If we don’t do and take for us first then others will surely do and take for themselves first, so we gotta get ours!”

Reality: “Can special costumes and trinkets you adorn yourselves with, or pieces of fabric you hang from poles and worship ever give you the license and authority to murder, withhold from or conspire against others?”

Ideologues: “Absolutely! Social authority gives us the right to do whatever we fucking think is right and fair to do!”

Reality: “Which would you rather do? A) create and/or achieve sustainable systems, or B) game each other out of money, resources and life force?”

Ideologues: “B!!!! Gotta get this money! Living and benefitting at other people’s expense is the smartest thing to do!”

Reality: “Would you rather A) look important to others, or B) be effective, affective, capable and potent?”

Ideologues: “A!! We need all the attention! We want everybody to see us shine and look important!!”

Reality: “Would you rather A) make progress, or B) hold others back and keep them from progressing?”

Ideologues: “B!! Hold others back!! They need to know their place, which is behind and beneath us at all times!”

Reality: “Would you prefer growth and balance, or comfort and convenience?”

Ideologues: “We will kill you or anyone in order to acquire more comfort and convenience!!”

Reality: “Which would you rather do… A) be honest and reasonable? Or B) hide behind your pride and be deflective, combative and inconsolable?”

Ideologues: “B!!! Pride over everything!”

Reality: “AND THERE YOU HAVE IT, FOLKS! That’s our show! My Conscientious People… y’all got anything you wanna add?”

Conscientious People: “Nahhhh….”

Ideologues: “Wait!! The show’s over? Did we win?? Of course we fucking won! We’re the fucking best!!”

Reality: “One thing I can absolutely promise you is that you will have your reward. I want you to take just a minute to look over all of your answers…”

Ideologues: “We killed that shit, right?”

Reality: “What kind of system could exist and sustain with beings like you causing so much imbalance and distress to it, out of sheer ignorance and vanity?”

Ideologues: “We don’t cause imbalance or distress to systems or anyone! We’re special and unique! Everybody loves us, and you’re lucky to even have us here! We make everything we touch better! We’re a blessing to you and all!”

Reality: “This is exactly why things like you can’t be allowed to exist. This is an example of why that corrupt outlook and way of being must be purged from existence with extreme prejudice. You will have your reward.”